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Hello True Believers!

Just a few quick updates for ya since some of you have actually expressed some mild to middling interest... Thanks Mom.

The 3 Geeks Movie!...

Well, the cameras have yet to start rolling...or digitizing or whatever the hell they do now. It has been frustrating, believe me. But I remain optimistic, nonetheless, and will keep you posted. There's really basically nothing to report on the movie front.

But the good 3 Geeks news is the new 3-issue mini-series which issue #1 is now being solicited. So order your copies now! The 3 issues will run back-to-back-to-back (cover from #2 posted here today!). Solicited Nov, Dec, Jan for Jan, Feb, March releases. The boys tackle to whole CGC "slabbing" debate in this mini-series...and they do it in typical, over-the-top 3 Geeks style. It's outrageous fun and the fine fellas over at CGC are completely endorsing this! 'Course, they haven't seen what I'm doing to them yet. Ha Ha Ha...

Three Fingers...

Three Fingers is currently out of print in the USA! That's right, sold out! I believe a new print run will be out in 2009 but, presently, I have no publisher attached. So if you just happen to run a multi-million dollar publishing house feel free to gimme a jingle.

The Italian edition, Quattro Dita, just recently came out, however! Very cool, since Lasagna still ranks in my top 3 all-time favorite foods. I dig on pizza too, man. Quattro Dita translates to "Four Fingers" actually--which struck me weird--but was explained to me that they don't call the thumb a thumb over in Italy. It's one of five fingers on the hand. So they felt if they were to remain with a title translated to read "Three Fingers" it would confuse their readers. Okay, I can buy that I guess. As long as it sells decently I ain't gonna quibble.

BB WOLF & THE 3 L.P.S...

BB is just getting it's final tweaks on the lettering/editing and I gotta tell ya it's looking absolutely beautiful. Johnnie and I are very proud and very anxious (especially Johnnie--this will bust his publishing cherry, y'know!) to see the project come to it's final fruition and have it in your hands! We're being told from the braintrust at Top Shelf that they're looking at a summer release. Definitely be ready at Comic-Con 2009 from what I'm gathering. We've also recruited cover wunderkind Matt Kindt to assist us with the cover design! This is quite a coup for us as Matt is one of the top cover artists in the biz.

The King!...

Been a few foreign editions out, the latest the german one, I think. Also, some potentially exciting new news on The King front but I'm just going to leave it at that for now. A big fat tease.

And after I'm finished with the 3 Geeks mini and the finishing touches on BB Wolf I'll be moving onto some other VERY exciting projects! I've got a few things cooking but, again, gonna stay hush hush for now. It's a superstition thing. Don't wanna jinx anything. One of the things that will be a "for sure" though is a sketchbook. I've been doing some very nice commissions over the past couple years and it struck me that I should cobble together a sketchbook. So I'm on that and looking for a summer/Comic-Con release.

I'm also looking hard at an "Omnibus" edition collecting all the 3 Geeks stories...also toying with full-color on that! "Toying" currently the operative word. It's looking like a strong possibility, though, as I'm just about out of all back stock on all the issues. So if you need anything get it now!

That's about it for this week. No bitching about roofers (although they all do still suck total @$$!) or pithy jokes. Just some publishing updates for my devoted readers. Because they deserve it BY CROM!




As you may have surmised from the title of this particular blog, my dear friends, there is currently no love lost between me and anyone in the roofing profession. Nay. In fact,I think it's safe to say that I hate every last one of the mother******s.

As some of you may know we've had a nightmare of a summer dealing with our roof. To be specific the contractor, Skip's General Contracting, owner one Mr. Skip Kubiak, completely effed up our house in June when they tore off the old shingles on the day we had record rainfalls here in Wisconsin and then, to the utter disbelief of anyone containing more than one brain cell, neglected to tarp the roof as the pitch black rainclouds thundered in! Even though I myself, our tenant, our neighbor and good ole Skip all separately at different moments, told his knucklehead crew the major storm was coming and they should tarp it up and hightail it outta there!

They did not.

Yes, this is old news. You read about the massive damages to our home that totaled $22,000.00 dollars in damages and 8 weeks dealing with repair crews and the insurance agents. Yep, that's the old news.

So, here's the update and why my previous loathing of roofers has now turned to utter hatred.

Skip Kubiak's crew did eventually "finish" the roof )Note the quote marks around the word finish. This'll come into play again later). Yep, they shingled it all up and got the Hell out of our lives, right? Sure. And we paid them--had to to get the insurance money--and they slithered away.

Couple days later it rains again and we get dripping water on the third floor.

We call good ole Skip Kubiak again and tell him. He sends crew back to fix. Crew caulks around dormer on third story and says, "Ees all good, now, mang. We feex." And they slither off.

Couple days later it rains. Yep, you guessed it, we got dripping water on third floor where they just "feexed" the leak. I call good ole Skip Kubiak again. He says he'll send back the crew to feex. I say, "Um, at this point would it be okay for me to ask for a different crew? This crew hasn't exactly done what I'd call a bang-up job...y'know? And, if it's not too much to ask could you send a crew I can actually communicate with?" He says yes, he will now send a different crew.

New crew arrives a few days later. They speak english, which is good, and go up and fix my dormer. They explain how they found one gaping hole one guy could fit his whole hand in! They're aghast at how the prior crew could've missed this. I am too. Who wouldn't be, right? So, they fill it in and we're all good! Whew! "At last!" we say! A gaping hole up there. That must have been where the water was coming in. But now it's filled in and we can finally get some peace. And the crew that's doing the interior fixes is nearing the end so our nightmare will soon be all over. Oh thank God...Thank god.

Couple days later it rains again. Yep, you guessed it, we get dripping on the third floor. Yep, same exact spot.

At this point in time we've got painters now working on the exterior of our home. You see, the whole "getting the roof redone" and "painting up the exterior afterwards" were all part of our big masterplan to fix up the house so we could sell it!!!! Good plan, eh? Yeah, right!

So, anyway, the exterior painting crew is out there and they've got a guy up on the rooftop painting our dormers and I ask the chief if he can have the guy look at our dormers and see if he can find anywhere the rain might be coming in. He says, sure, and that the guy's his brother and that he's a ROOFER! He's just helping out with this paint job. SWEET! The guy's a roofer so he'll know what to look for, I think. He comes down a few minutes later and tells me there's a lot of bad things going on up there. He tells us, now get this!, that Skip Kubiak's crew NEVER FINISHED THE JOB!!! That's right. Never finished the job.

What do you mean? We ask. He informs us that the top of our roof which is flat and supposed to have been newly "rubberized" was, in fact, NOT. Apparently they did half of the flat portion and then, y'know, just kind of stopped. Yep, what the hell...why not? Already caused this poor family all kinds of hell so, heck, why would we do our best to salvage any kind off pride and/or respect in our work and/or ourselves and just finish the job we were paid to do? Yeah. So the guy says give him a camera and he'll take pictures for us. Yeah, we look at the pictures. Yeah, unfinished roof.

Now keep in mind this is 8 weeks since Skip Kubiak's (am I using his name enough so you'll all remember?) crew supposedly finished the roof. And also keep in mind this is the top of a 3 story roof. It's not like I could climb up there and check that they ever finished. I was also in a cast on my foot so I couldn't even if I had wanted to.

So, I call good ole Skip Kubiak again. He cuts me off before I can say anything saying that he's done and it's in the insurance company's hands and it's not his fault and so on and so on. He finally needs to take a breath and I inform him that his crew never finished the job. This stops him in his tracks. What do you mean, he asks. I tell him of this new information I have just found out about the rubberizing. He says, "So now you're telling me that they never finished rubberizing the roof?" I tell him that that is what I am telling him, yes. He tells me he'll be to our house Monday morning as he is currently out of state. This was a Thursday.

On Wednesday the following week he arrives. He calls me from outside and tells me he's checking to see what he'll need in materials to finish the job and finish it this week.

Days pass and no Skip.

I call him the following week.

Days pass, no Skip.

I call him again.

Days...You know the drill.

It has now been months and, yep, I've had enough. I call the local news channels--you know, they all have their investigative reporters who go after losers like Skip. Within minutes of calling "4OnYourSide", one of the local news stations, they call me back saying that Skip told them "Stop bothering me! I'm talking with my insurance company and we're going to get it fixed!" and then hangs up on them.

Later that day I get a call from one Levi Nolte of Lake Park Builders. He says that he's a friend of Skip's and that he'll be taking over the job for Skip. Okay, I say. Levi tells me that he'll be over the following day to assess and then that weekend, if it's alright with us, he'll finish the job. Is it alright with us? What the F**K?! I very politely and appreciatively thank him and tell him "Yes" please do it as soon as he can and whichever day he gets the chance. No need to call us the day before and ask. Just do it as soon as he gets a window in his schedule.

He tells me he'll do it on that Saturday, 7 am.

Saturday. No Levi Nolte. I call him. He tells me that Skip didn't pay him what he said he would yet so he's not coming. I choke back the anger and disgust and politely ask him how much we're talking about. He tells me it'll cost $400 for materials and another $300 for labor. THAT'S IT?!! now Skip's being a jerk for $700??? I plead with him to get over here as soon as he can and just do this. I tell him that I WILL PAY HIM IF SKIP DOES NOT. He tells me he'll try Skip again and get back to me asap.

Meanwhile, I call my dear old friend from high school, TJ Daley, who owns his own construction company and fill him in. He knows about our troubles we've been having but not the full extent. So i fill him in. I ask if he could do the job. He says, yes, in fact he has an opening in his schedule the upcoming week. I tell him that I will gladly pay him what it requires, I just want my roof fixed and by someone I trust. He comes over to assess the job and I tell him about this new guy, Levi Nolte. He tells me if that doesn't work out give him a call back and he'll do the job.

Alright, now we're finally feeling better about all of this. We have two guys lined up. Surely one or the other will come through. Sure it'll cost me another $700 but at this point we don't care. We just want our roof fixed.

So a couple days later Levi Nolte comes back with the materials. But it's too wet up top to finish. Yeah, it rained again. Yeah, more leaks! Yeah, that was plural...leaks. We got a new one in the meantime near another dormer. Yeah.

So, TJ calls and leaves a message. Asks me what's up? I'm expecting Levi that day so I don't call TJ right back. Levi never shows. Next day I call TJ and tell him, "F**K Levi, F**K Skip. I've got materials, I'll pay you to do the job. Come on over as soon as you can. Thanks, call me back."

No calls back. No Skip, no Levi, no TJ. But 4OnYourSide has been checking in with me. At least I got that going for me. I update them and they say they'll apply more pressure on Skip. Cool! At least they're bugging the shit out of the bastard. Small victories at this point but I'll take it dammit. And it felt good.

Meanwhile Levi writes me an email telling me how he regrets ever bumping into Skip and feeling sorry for him and how he's a total a-hole and he loathes Skip and Skip's now putting this all on him and wants to pay him with materials he doesn't even need instead of cash because Skip's now totally broke. BUT he's a man of his word and he's going to finish our roof because he told us he would!

I write him back agreeing that Skip is, in fact, an a-hole, yes, I completely agree. I also thank him for being a man of his word and reiterate that I will pay him the $300.00 for his labor.

He writes back apologizing for venting and says he'll be over this weekend.

Never shows. Meantime I put in another call to TJ. Never calls back.

I call the Better Business Bureau on Skip and file a complaint. Now they're after him. It pleases me. Little victories.

That weekend, Sunday, we're out running some errands. We get back around noon and there's a message from Levi. he said he could come over that day and finish the roof. He just called about an hour ago! I call him right back! he says he'll be over soon. YES!!! At last! I tell Sandy. Phone rings seconds later. I'm doing something and can't pick it up. I know...I just know...I listen to the voice mail. Levi. Can't make it. Guy who was supposed to help him made other plans. But he'll be over sometime that week as the weather's supposed to be nice all week. This is the end of October now. Time's running out weather-wise.

Week was nice. Very nice. Sunny and warm. Levi Nolte never shows. The following week I blast him in an email telling him that he's just like Skip. A liar and a thief and that because he's now strung me along for 5 WEEKS and the weather's turning I'm totally screwed. I ask him how guys like him can sleep at night. I then say that I'm sure that guys like him and Skip sleep just fine. Haven't heard back.

4OnYourSide called me last Thursday. They're going to ramp it up on good ole Skip Kubiak again.

Roof still leaks when it rains. Winter's coming. Looks like I'll have to start calling roofers in Spring.

Oh yeah, I forgot! I called on other guy, Gunther something, somewhere in the thick of the Levi/TJ time and he said he'd come over and take a look. He never showed. And I offered the painter who took pictures for me money to finish the job and he was very pleased by my offer and said he'd do it and he also never showed. I'm missing alot of the details but I think you all get the gist, right?

So, am I right? Is the title of this blog right? Do roofers all go to the same @$$hole school? And I won't even get into the way these guys look! I won't descend to their level. Oh hell, yes I will, they deserve it! Of the oh, say, 14-18 roofers we came across in these past 6 months I'd say they had 26 teeth total, all brown. Five knew what a haircut was. 3 ever met a stick of deodorant. 1 had a clean shirt.




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